Thursday, April 2, 2015

Tehran Confirms Nuclear Bomb Finished Aimed at US

Tehran Nuclear bomb

After the breakthrough jibber gabber between the United States and Iran, John Kerry retreated back into his PTSD therapy session, while blaring Trace Adkins. On the other side of the world, Iranian Foreign Minister Javad Zarif walked through a Theran uranium enrichment facility, adjusted his crotch and proceeded to pat himself on the back. Hassan Rouhani adjusted his turban and swiped his bangs to the side. The day was April the 2nd, and it would be the day that Iran would secure nuclear weapons and conquer the world.

It is fairly obvious that any country in the world that really matters owns nuclear weapons. Those that don't are stuck in an era of famine and will die off soon enough anyway. Despite owning the world's biggest collection of massive murder bombs, the Americans want no one else to have it, especially Iran.  Little did they know, John McCain had been working hardcore espionage alongside Kerry. The pair of POWer players seek out retribution for being forced into war. Little did either man know they could've taken the Muhammad Ali route and bailed out.

Now, Tehran holds nuclear weapons and Americans should be shatting their beds, because the Islamic Republic of Iran Army is aiming to mutilate western pigs. With Mossad on the horizon, Netanyahu will look to challenge Rouhani to a sumo match up, in order to bring down the Iranians. Benny brings the momentum into the bout, since he recently pulled off a stunning electoral victory.

With the recent Kenyan massacre, it is clear the CIA is stepping up their game. With the cooperation between the CIA and Mossad, it is imperative for the US to pull off Sandy Hook style assassinations throughout Iran, in order to impose fear in the Iranians, according to a sobbing John Boehner. With this type of strategy, the Iranians will fear the Imperialist army of the Socialist America and cower under the leadership of Teddy W. Cruz, who is prepared to send his entire heritage back to their homeland in a peace offer.

Perhaps all is lost? Head to Amazon and purchase your Geiger counter, iodine tablets and diapers, because all heck is about to break loose. Hop into your private jet, lock that cockpit and prepare to nose dive. It is the only way to escape the misery that is about to be rained down upon the world. The second coming is upon us and Iran is prepared to open the gates to allow evil into the world. Pray for salvation or find an exit immediately!

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